Today will be my last day home with my little Liam. I know I will have other days, but it has been 2 weeks that I have spent with him, and while he is quite a bit of work (his ability to find mischief even at this young age has me a bit concerned for the rest of his life!), but it also has it moments like now, where Liam and Burton are napping in bed and I'm on the computer. I should probably be cleaning or unpacking, but today, today I want to be close to my little guy and spoil and nurse him as much as he would like. And I am more than all right with that. See, I had a few rough days. I was putting so much pressure on myself to do everything perfect, have the house organized and unpacked (at least most of the things) and making sure Liam and Burton and Sean are all happy. When in the process of all of that, I forgot to make sure I was keeping myself happy.
So, that all started yesterday, or the day before, I don't recall. But it started. I let go of having a few piles of crap on the kitchen table (I really did the best I could to let go, that is) and I started to enjoy the fact that I have mountains all around me. I stopped looking at the dog hair on the floor in the bathroom and watched Liam play peek a boo with me around the door way. Sean and I spent some time getting boxes out of our living area and I decided that each night I have to either clean or work out after Liam goes to bed. And just like that, just a few changes and poof, I feel better about everything. I feel like my ability to be a mom isn't invisible, I feel like I am strong again (the pull up I did could have helped with that) and I feel at peace inside...less stressed and more relaxed. I needed that, and I know I need more of it. But of now, I am going to take it all one day at a time, I have a sleeping baby, a sleeping dog and an afternoon full of solo adventures ahead of us! It's going to be a good day!
No comments:
Post a Comment