Looking back...

It's always good for me to sit and look back on things, whether it be a long weekend, a work event, or in this case, the whole year.  It's also a good way for me to get back into my blogging, it's been too long since I have visited here, shared my thoughts and memories for me to look back on.  So here I am, I know, you have been waiting and waiting for this, right? :)

It has been a wild year, to say the least.  I have so many ups and downs, I'm not even sure where to start.  I started the year pregnant with Cora, she was giving me a hard time, but I worked through it.  I even managed to get some snowboarding in when I was 7 months pregnant at our State Winter Games, which we had to cancel - which brought many tears...but instead of focusing on that, I think I'll look forward to this year and making sure our event makes up for it!  Then I was just working, working and working.  We had State Basketball, which had over 100 teams and was exhausting!  Being 8 months pregnant, running here and there took a tole, but I made it through.  During all of this, I was preparing for Summer Games, since I was going to have Cora a month or so before that.  There was very little downtime at work for me, since I wanted to be as prepared as possible for the Summer Games.  I knew I was going to be out for a while, but also knew I wanted to get back to work as soon as possible, rather to get things in order for the games.  I went through a lot of emotions when I realized it was possible that I was going to miss Summer Games due to Cora.  I couldn't miss Summer Games - I haven't missed a Summer Games in 15 years, I couldn't this year.  So, through some tears, pleading and proposals of my plan it worked out, I was able to work from home with Cora leading up to the games and had her with me most of the games.  It was great, it was hard, but it was worth it.

Then there was Cora, my sweet little baby girl...who came to us in the most amazing way possible.  I think back to it all, to the labor, to the times I told Sean I couldn't do it, to when he said it was time to go, to when all of a sudden, she was here.  The moment was amazing, it was everything I wanted and more.  Sean got to catch my wonderful baby girl and she has been amazing from day one.  She has nursed like a champ, she sleeps pretty well and while I still spend way too much time cuddling her, it is worth every minute of it.  Maybe I don't get my evening work out in, or maybe the laundry stays in the dryer a bit longer, but her snuggles and cuddles are worth each and every moment.  I am soaking them up, watching her sleeping and nurse and just being in love with everything about her.

And then there is Liam, that kid.  I love that kid so much.  He has such a mind of his own, his imagination is amazing and his spirit is beyond incredible.  I am so lucky to have this boy with such energy, and so much love for everything.  I mean, he is a 3 year old, so he has his moments, but when he is in a good mood, he is the sweetest.  I love the way he wants to help cheer up Cora, as a matter of fact, yesterday, he was pouting because she was still crying after he tried to make her feel better.  He wants to help to everything, I can do that, he says quite often...he wants to help daddy when daddy is working, he wants to help mommy when I'm cooking...his world is just a canvas for him  to learn and I hope we are teaching him well.

And I'm sure there are a million more things we did this year that remind me of how lucky I am to be where I am be with the people I'm with.  I took the kids back to Illinois for a fun trip, we had lots of visitors that help remind us of the paradise we live in.  We started some traditions like donuts from downtown Evergreen and a hike by the lake on a weekend morning when we are both home.  We are reminded that people don't to be related to be family.  We were lucky to have sold our house in IL, just recently, which was both relieving and sad all at the same time.

We finally camped this summer in our new camper and it was amazing.  I was reminded how much I love to camp...and the places we get to go and the stars we can see on each trip are such a reminder of what a beautiful place we live in.  We went on adventures as a family that I enjoy more than I thought.  The kids are loving being outside - if Liam is in the right mood, he will stay outside all day and night, with no complaints, except when it's time to come inside.

I was reminded of the strong person I am the person I want to keep being for me and for my kids.  I am finding the balance of being a mom, working, being a wife and still being the person I want to be. I have rediscovered my desire to do things, like snowboarding and climbing and even though I have kids, I can still be the person I was once...I will just need to adjust my expectations a bit.

It has been a beyond incredible year for me and for us as a family.  We are so blessed to have so many people to be thankful for in our lives.  We wake up in paradise every morning and while we have to work and live our lives each day, which is not always easy, we always get to come home to our mountain retreat, endless stars and a home we have created.

P.S.  These kiddos have become more than a big part of my life, they are my life...something no one really tells you about being a parent...oh, that, and they will drive you crazy any chance you get and make you laugh and smile harder than you ever have in your life.  I wouldn't trade them for the world and I look forward to seeing what the new year brings for all of us, especially them!

Three

It's the magic number, right...yes, yes it is.  Yesterday Liam turned three.  How is that possible?  How was he born just 3 years ago, I feel like so much has happened in that time, I can't even wrap my head around it.  I think back on the day he was born, his story, our first few months, our first year and so on.  And I am so proud of that little guy - he is turning into such a kid, such his own person, which is great!  Of course, he has his moments, many of them, but most kids do, right?  So today I will take a few minutes to remember what I love most about him right now.  There aren't words to really express how much I love him, how much my love has grown as he has grown, but here are just a few things that make me smile about him for now, would love to freeze these moments in time:

• I love the way he cuddles and plays with Cora, a little too hard at some point, but he will just come up and hug and kiss her in the sweetest way.  I also love the way he says "Sweetie, it's OK" when she is crying, similar to how I say it to her.
• He is a parrot - he repeats what we say, which can be quite funny - he got us all laughing this weekend when he repeated my mom saying "Oh gosh" and then continued to say it over and over as we laughed.
• He is ready to do things on his own, get out his cereal in the morning, get his boots on, so many things that he does each day to help me, makes me so happy to have the help and a little sad he isn't needing me in that way so much anymore.  
• During bath time, he thinks it's hilarious to sit in Cora's bathtub after she gets out.  I have no idea how he manages to get in and out, but he does and he giggles when he is in there in such a goofy silly way.
• He still stomps his little feet into our bedroom some nights and while some nights Sean takes him back to his room, some nights he climbs up and sneaks in without us knowing, it typically means that Cora wakes up when I move here and I have little to no room to sleep, but it's the most loving night of "rest" I can get.  He's getting so big I'm not sure how long he'll fit in bed with us, but I'll let it keep happening as long as he wants.  
• The faces he makes, the way he rolls his eyes at us (how does a 3 year old even know what that means), the smiles he gives when he knows he is asking for something he shouldn't have and they way he knows how to make me laugh when I need it the most.
• How he hugs and kisses me - I feel like hugs and kisses with kids are always changing, but right now, he runs to me, tries to tackle me and hugs me so big, I love it...even if I'm not expecting it and he tackles me.
• Reading books with him when he can fill in some of the words, hearing him learn new words and new sounds and just listening to him talk, sometimes I still have no idea what he is saying, but he is talking and he knows what he wants!

I'm sure I can go on and on and perhaps I'll add more later, but for now, I will be done with his 3 year post, maybe someday he'll want to read these, most likely I'll sit and cry and read these when he is a teenager, but whatever the case may be, I'm happy to capture these moments, just for a little bit longer.

This was my last picture of my 2 year old, the night before his 3rd birthday.